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I was born in Stuart, Florida which is located in southeast Florida. Sunny Florida, and most of all - HOT Florida. The humidity matches the temperature except when it drops below 85 degrees. Then it stays at 85% humidity regardless of the temperature. I moved from Florida to Colorado where I've been living on and off (mostly on) since Halloween night of 1973. I really love the weather in Colorado, although I still call Florida my home. The way I figure it, I'm just living here until I move back to Florida (for the third time). Problem for me is that most of my family is still in Florida so I don't get to see them very much any more. I have relatives in the Carolinas and Georgia (we're Southerners), but with the exception of my grown children and some not so grown children, that's where everyone resides. Can't beat the weather here in Colorado though, it's great! Forget what the temperature is; with no humidity it really doesn't matter. High temps such as in the 90s mean very little when the humidity is 20% or so. Colorado can also have some pretty low temperatures. But once again, with almost zero humidity in the winter, it doesn't feel very cold. In the beginning I had lots of different jobs and hobbies too, most of which were designed to keep me as absolutely hot in Florida as humanly possible. You know, jobs like picking roses on a rose farm, flowers on a flower farm, working outside pumping gas in my Grandfathers' Texaco station (and about 10 other gas stations when I was younger), surveying land/nuclear plants/swamps/etc., car mechanic, building houses, working for a printing company, selling wigs door-to-door, selling used cars, you know, the usual stuff. You name it, I probably did it. You see, Stuart, Florida is a sleepy little town north of Palm Beach about 50 miles, and the only thing it had to offer when I was a kid was tourism, fishing, and flower farms. There really wasn't much of an industry there other than flower farms and citrus stuff, but the flower farms are pretty much gone now due to everyone moving to Stuart once they discovered how pretty it was and the proximity to two salt water rivers, Lake Okeechobee, and the Atlantic Ocean. They still grow some flowers there, but not like they used to. The land was worth more for housing so the flower farm folks sold it to builders and that pretty much ended the flower farming. Fishing was also important and still the popular sport today. The main town where fishing occurred is part of Martin County (Stuart is the county seat) and very close to where I lived. The name of the town is Salerno. Do to the fishing, boating, and beaches (basically water stuff), Stuart ended up attracting what we called "Yankees" - people from up north. "Yankee" is a very popular word in my family. I don't believe I've ever gotten off a plane when going to Florida that I didn't hear a relative say the word "Yankee" before we got out of the airport. You'd have to live there to understand this, but heck even the Yankees call each other Yankees. In any case, Stuart is now a booming town with lots of Yankees and believe it or not - it has some of the people I grew up with still living there. Many of the other more Southern people (as well as my own family) have moved to the Carolinas and Georgia to escape the Yankees.
I have a lot of info to fill in, but I'll jump up to my second marriage that occurred in 1980 to Chris. The picture above is of us on our Wedding day in 1980. You'll find other pictures on this website with Chris and me but since this section is about background/early year stuff, thought I'd include it so you could see what we looked like when we were younger. Most people see the picture and say what the heck is she doing with an old man like you? All I can say is that when I met Chris I was around 30 going on 20, and she was about 23 years old. I was really pretty wild acting and she wasn't, so that had a rather calming effect on me. I think the good news for me was that she brought stability to the table for me, and for her, I brought spontaneity and risk taking plus a crazy, Southern, sense of humor.
Here's a picture of Chris and me from 1986.
Here's another picture of us from 1999
while at the Vista point on the north side of the Golden Gate Bridge in San
Francisco.
This is a
recent picture I took
of Chris.
Here we are about 24 years later and it still feels the same way.
Kind of like a cat and a dog living together. Really very different people, but it's
good and seems to work. Chris has a B.S. Electrical
Engineering degree from University of
I'm currently in the process of writing a book named "Crazy At The Top." The book is about idiots in management and how they really screw up perfectly good companies and ruin morale for the employees as well as affect customers and shareholder value. Seems like the crazies keep showing up no matter where people go to work and no matter the kind of job. The book is more of an expose' on how the crazies do their tricks as well as some humor I include regarding really stupid management stories. Kind of my way of paying back these idiots after having to put up with them for so many years. I don't identify names (because I'm not interested in a lawsuit), and the book includes observations by many folks from different parts of the general work force, so it isn't just my opinion. There really isn't any shortage of info to put in the book since management in general has gotten really lousy since the 1980s. The short-term quarterly results focus of companies has forced a state of desperation that attracts crazies like flies to .... well, you know. Hopefully this book will make a top seller. Not about the money, just exposing these fools is plenty enough.
I was thinking about listing some of the jobs I have had, but don't really remember all of them. I was always in to something or another, so the different jobs were kind of a way of life. I've included a rather large list below, but about the time I think I'm done, I remember another one. I didn't necessarily do the jobs for very long, and it wasn't an indicator of whether I was a stable worker or not, just that the jobs didn't pay well, would become boring, I didn't have an advanced education in the early years, depended on where I was living at the time, or it was time to move on. Most of them were rather menial jobs that didn't amount to much, but required me to be creative given how boring they were. I spent most of my time observing how crazy people can behave and coupled with my practical-joke humor, I had fun with it. I get email from folks now and then asking me how I could have had so many jobs. I will answer that by saying that you would have to really know me to understand the answer to that question. You also have to remember that I have been working most of my life even back to when I was a kid working at my Grandfather's gas station. I have friends like Tombo that have had far more interesting jobs than me (like when he decided to be a dog groomer and had a poodle bite him - that made him give up on that career). Haven't been doing that much moving around job-wise since the 80s, but prior to that it was something else. Especially when I was in my teens and early twenties, and especially after I hurt my back in 1972. The jobs listed below aren't in any particular order, just a stream of consciousness kind of thing. Following the job listing I've added just a few of my hobbies, most of which turn in to an obsession (usually an expensive one).
JobsGas Station worker - worked at my Grandfather's gas station dating back to being a kid. I would never let my kids do this kind of a job since times are different now, but for me it was really fun being around my Grandparents since I could check the air in the tires, pump gas somewhat, stand on an orange crate and wash windshields, and go fishing with my Grandmother around lunch time at the local city dock. Besides working at my Grandfather's Texaco gas stations, I worked at a Sunoco, Shell, Esso, Cities Service (now Citgo), Gulf, Amoco, Standard Oil, and a Kayo gas station. I worked at these stations over a period of years sometimes working at two different gas stations in the same day/evening. Flower/Rose Farm Worker - did this before I even had a driver's license. Hot, hard work that was not fun at all and paid as little as 35 cents an hour. I think the most I ever made was $1.40 per hour. Worked at about five different flower farms and the largest rose farm on the East coast of the U.S. Photographer's Apprentice - worked on big Kodak still cameras that were on a track and used arc lights. The job was fun learning how to shoot pictures on this giant camera and enjoyed the work. Also worked at what is known as a "stripper." This is a person that cuts out negatives and mounts them in masks for magazine articles, posters, calendars, cardboard boxes, and just about anything else you would find at a printing company. This was strictly a night job for me. The biggest thrill was developing microfilm for missiles during the mid 60s. Worked as a surveyor and also as a gas station attendant during the daytime. Surveyor - I surveyed every lot on Jupiter Island, Florida and most of Martin County, Florida. Laid out a lot of roads and housing lots at Pt. St. Lucie, Florida too. I was also a Rodman, Instrument Man, and Crew Chief on the Hutchinson Island Nuclear Plant in Ft. Pierce, Florida. Being a surveyor was actually a very fun time of my life since it brought me in contact with obscure places that most people never got to see. The worst part - "cutting line" through a mangrove swamp on the Hutchinson Island Nuclear Plant for about 2 years with all the mosquitoes, scorpions, alligators and snakes around me. I've had to go in to a pond where I saw Cotton Mouth Moccasins enter the water just before I had to go in when I was doing field surveying. I was also chased by an alligator once that had babies around. Also stepped on rattlesnakes a couple of times scaring the hell out of me. Got bitten by a rattlesnake and a moccasin (not on the same day) during my stint at one company doing field surveying. Moccasin's really hurt when they bite. Really enjoyed the practical jokes with snakes and spiders. Also tied an anchor to a guy's leg once and dared him to throw the anchor 100 feet. He tried and it snatched him off the bow of the boat. We actually had to drive the boat around off shore until he cooled down. Also sank a couple of boats with folks in them while doing river bottom soundings as parts of "gags" that didn't pan out. Windmill Repairman - here's another odd one. Signed up for a day labor job when I was 16 in Augusta, Georgia and got a job to repair a windmill. The guy that owned the business (strange business, isn't it?) asked me if I was interested in fixing a few more so I said sure. He hired me as a "Windmill Mechanic" (he was known as a "Windmill Boss") and I went on several jobs with him to learn about these beauties before fixing three more on my own. Mostly it was to grease the open gears on Aermotor Windmills, fix "sucker rods," and replace loose or missing vanes. He didn't pay me for the last job I did so I quit the job never to do it again. Said he was "running a little short." Mechanic - lots of mechanic work off and on. I can rebuild anything. Worked as a Volkswagen/Porsche mechanic, pulled engines as a job, and just about anything else a mechanic would do. Have scars on my hands and some broken bones due to "slippage" when pulling engines or having someone "bump the starter" when putting in piston/rod assemblies. I had perpetually dirty hands and fingernails while doing this job (hey, at least I didn't bite my nails). Auto Parts Salesman - worked the desk at a couple of local auto parts store in Stuart, Florida in the 60s. Always amazed me that when a person came in to buy a part for their car we almost always had it. Didn't seem like there was THAT much stock in the back but there was. The good part was that I got parts for next to nothing for building my souped-up Chevys. Bad part was doing inventory and unloading parts trucks when they came in with a shipment. Especially when there was a shipment of crankshafts and flywheels. Body Shop Repair - worked in a body shop repairing dents, painting cars, etc. Actually went to school at night to learn how to do it and then worked in a body shop. When my second girl Michelle was born, I had to go to the body shop where I was working, to hurry up and get my 1965 GTO that I had just finished painting the night before. My first wife had already had Michelle by the time I made it back to the house (a friend took her to the hospital). One of my least favorite paint jobs was a job I did on a classic car that I was told was Acrylic Lacquer and it turned out that it was an Enamel paint job. If you have ever painted Lacquer over Enamel you know what happens. Boy what a mess that turned in to. I quit the job rather than go back and strip the car and start from scratch. Don't think I got paid for that paint job. Pop Shoppe Sales - There used to be a company in Denver known as the Pop Shoppe that sold colored water billed as cola drinks. Think really cheap drinks that were mostly colored water with sugar and some "flavoring" added to it. Did this job for a few days on the side until I sold all that I had bought at a discount. Mostly in the neighborhood where I lived. Thought they would sell well since they were so cheap but I was wrong. Selling a case of those pops and a guy could have enemies. Crab Trapper - tried this for a short while. Bought a guy's crab trap run for a hundred dollars and got to the point that I hated to get them due to all the hard work and really low prices for crabs. Florida Blue Crabs mostly. Seems like all I ever got was a back ache and constantly being pinched by those stupid crabs. Sugar Cane Cutter - did this job for a week too long (the job was only a week). A guy asked me if I would be interested in cutting sugar cane near Okeechobee Florida and I told him sure. They had already burned the cane fields and I showed up with a worthless machete and no gloves. A hard, dirty, sweaty job that yielded blisters and lots of encounters with snakes once I started whacking on the cane. I was the only white guy at the place and the only one that spoke English. I stayed long enough to get paid for the week and at a whopping 35 cents an hour, was glad it was over. At least I got paid in cash, or rather, pocket change at that low pay scale. Roof Truss Builder - this job didn't last too long. Basically, I cut roof truss boards to length and then nailed them together. Learned a lot about roofing trusses and roof pitches and all but a very boring job with lots of splinters and hammer dings on my thumbs. Pin Chaser - Bowling Alley work. Decided it would be fun to learn how bowling alley equipment worked so my next door neighbor in Ft. Pierce, Florida offered me a job and I took it as a pin chaser at night while working during the day on the Nuclear Plant. Learned how to repair the pin sweep and waxed lanes. Had a lot of fun fooling with folks by giving them "goofy" balls that wouldn't roll straight, knocking over pins so the underdog would win, etc. Paper Boy - delivered the Miami Herald to folks in Stuart, Florida mostly at about 5:30AM. The "funniest" thing I did in this job was pilfer the chocolate milk from the local Circuit Court judge's milk box. People were always avoiding paying me for the newspapers. It wasn't all that much money but Yankees can be cheap (they were the only ones that ever avoided me). Short Order Cook - this was hard work! Worked at a Royal Castle (similar to White Castle or Crystal Burgers) as a short order cook. Made hamburgers by the gazillions, made breakfast stuff for late night drunks and cops. You don't want to know what was done with a customer's food when the customer ticked someone off. USO Club Janitor - yep, actually worked at an old USO Club. It was also known as the Stuart Civic Center. Mostly swept up and got tables prepared for parties. Not really very interesting, but it was close to the park where I could go out and swing on some really big swings they had overlooking the St. Lucie River. You're never too old to swing on a swing set in my opinion. Orange Grove Worker - picking oranges and grapefruits mostly followed by packing them. Hard, hot, work with plenty of rattlesnakes in the 'groves. Hated this job due to the heat and crummy pay. My hands were orange colored all the time due to the dye they used to make oranges look really orange. Carnie - did this for a real short time (as in a week or two) when I was a teenager. I ran the milk bottle knock-over game and a dime-tossing game that you see at carnivals. You can win at the milk bottle game but it depends on whether the heavy bottle (one of the three bottles is heavier than the others) is placed at the top or the bottom and you have to know how to hit the "bottles" to make them all fall down. Most people lost. The dime-tossing game was really tough unless you knew how to toss dimes in the right arc so they would land on something of value. They used car wax on the center of the plates so that the dimes would easily slide off the plates. I also wore a "werewolf" costume as part of a sideshow freak gimmick where I scared the heck out of people. Fun job, but very hot wearing the costume while dragging a chain around in my locked-up "pen." Carpenter - Did a lot of this. Built custom homes (not by myself, but included others including my best friend Tombo). Had a business doing outside trim in Colorado in the mid-70s as well as putting on shake shingle roofs, hanging doors, sliding glass doors, and framing. Worked in pre-cast joist construction building floors for condos. This is where I suffered my back injury that pretty much ended all of my physical labor-intensive skills like carpentry and mechanics (1972). Tried a comeback in 1973 and then again in 1974/75, but it just caused too much pain. Would actually have my friend Tombo and others stand me up after sitting down for lunch since I couldn't get up on my own due to back and sciatic hip pain. Ended up getting a good settlement from the insurance company but only after I lost pretty much everything I owned. Was also known as a major practical joker. The craziest thing I did was put a 6 foot rattlesnake in a 50 pound box of nails only later to ask a friend to get me some nails. You should have heard him yell when he jiggled the box and it started rattling (I know, this was dangerous). Iron Worker Apprentice - did this for a very short while since my back was messed up. Some of the heaviest lifting I ever did in my life and the most boring too. Test Boat Driver - worked in Stuart, Florida test-driving boats until my kidneys started giving me trouble (showed up as a low back ache) and they wanted to move me in to sanding the hulls of boats. Really didn't care for the sanding stuff. Lots of fun testing boats and boat motors, but didn't last too long. Was actually offered money to capsize a boat. Tried, but those darn Evinrude boats just wouldn't flip. Plumber Apprentice - tried this and found that they only wanted me to haul copper pipes around and do soldering which got old quick. Assembly Line Worker - a friend was looking for someone to work nights at his workplace on an assembly line for smoke detectors. I volunteered since I had never done that before and found out the job consisted of a long conveyor belt that constantly fed circuit boards that came by at a slow pace. My job? Stuff a single resistor in to a circuit board. That was it! Needless to say (but I'll say it anyway), I did this job for one week and told my buddy never again. It takes a special person to be able to do that kind of mindless work. Security Guard - hasn't everyone done this at one time or another? Verrryyy boring night work. Only bandit I ever saw was a Raccoon. Woodworker - refinished antiques, and painted furniture. This is now a hobby that I do when I can. My wife keeps me busy since she seems to think nothing of putting plants on 1800s antiques without putting a plate to catch the water underneath. This means I have at least 5 or 6 tables, sideboards, nightstands, desks, etc. to refinish. Order Puller - worked at a place named "More Valu Stamps" in Colorado where I pulled orders for shipping out to the various store locations. You probably remember the types of stamp places there were if you're old enough. Places like S&H and True Value stamps were similar to where I worked. Martial Arts Instructor - this was interesting. Actually was teaching people Indonesian Kung Fu (Silat) for a number of years. Taught a couple of cops self defense too. Ended up training people for free so that I could dump them when they were getting sloppy and not being serious and all. Last did this in the early 80s where I had to finally "retire" due to it just leaving me hurting too bad. My friend Roger Bodette and Joe Trujillo were the last of my students. They got as high as black belts. Roger was the real trooper working very hard and sticking to it. Really admired his determination. Sorry Roger for all the pain you suffered. Circuit Board Designer - worked as a draftsman laying out multi-plane circuit boards. Actually went to school and got a degree as an engineering draftsman. Quite proud of all the drafting skills I picked up. Could do exploded view drawings of complex transfer cases as well as architectural drawings. Glad I didn't stick with it since nowadays you can buy Visio and do what we did except in a tenth of the time. Electronic Technician - did this quite a bit in a variety of jobs. Even worked as an electronic tech on core memory computers, telephone analyzers, EEG machines, and blood analyzers. Met my friend Clay while working at the core memory computer business back in 1977. Acupuncturist - Acupuncturist? Yep, Acupuncturist. Actually have a degree in it. Went to class with regular doctors to learn acupuncture back in the mid-70s when the U.S. was first introduced to it as a result of Nixon and the Chinese government finally talking to each other. I took an acupuncture machine apart that is used for Ryodoraku therapy to see what was inside, saw there wasn't much in the way of electronic parts, looked at the high price, and decided electronics was for me. It was those electronic machines that led me to pursue electronics and Electrical Engineering which shaped my whole future. EEG Machine Engineer - got a job working on EEG machines and even designed a couple of EEG/EMG machines for biofeedback training. I found this to be a very interesting area and I'm still interested in the concept since it allows you to "hear" your mind at work (via audio feedback of the various brain frequencies). In my case I usually heard a flat line sound since I'm not so bright. Brainwave Analysis Instructor - did this as a job once for 3 days back in the mid-70s. I had attended several instructor level courses offered by Silva Mind Control and coupled with some research being done in Colorado, created a 3 day presentation for people to learn biofeedback training. Could have done it more than I did but found that the training attracted some pretty wacky people when the course was more about the tools to do the training than stroking crystals or burning incense. Instructor - worked at the University of Colorado in the Electrical Engineering department as a teacher where I taught several electronic labs courses and an analog filter design class. Satellite Systems Engineer - worked as an Electrical Engineer designing head-end equipment, satellite receivers, and dish positioners. Also got in to software development for embedded systems on satellite systems (mid to late 80s, 1990 and 1991). My friends Ben, Mike, and Tim worked in this area with me. Still see these guys now and then. You will frequently see them on my joke list if you receive jokes from me. EEs are really a special breed. Embedded systems guys are like the construction workers of engineering. They swear like construction guys too. Really good at practical jokes as well. Sr. Manager Software Development - ran all software development for IT at Time Warner Communications as well as production support for all the miscellaneous applications we used. This is where I met some of the brightest people that were really the sharpest group of non-EEs I ever worked with. Still see some of the people and even work with a cast of characters that left TWC, moved on to other companies, and we resurfaced again to work together where I was a Director in IT software development. System Tester - did this while working at Western Electric/Bell Labs. Tested the Dimension 2000 PBX. This is the job I had when I met my wife Chris. Bell Labs had very good processes for testing and even valued system testers (unlike most companies nowadays). Junkyard "Technician" - basically stripped parts off cars and trucks in a junkyard and sold them to the public. My favorite tool for removing parts was an acetylene torch. Drag Racer - had a very souped-up Volkswagen (don't laugh) dragster that I enjoyed drag racing. It had nitrous injection and ran in the low 8.40s at 148 mph. Scary fast for such a small, not-so-stock car. I also raced a stock car for a former boss where I was doing body work when he was injured as well as figure eight racing. Systems Engineer - did this for about 5 years. Wrote requirements for a variety of telecom systems including an AIN Service Management System, all kinds of other projects including reengineering projects. Wrote my thesis for my University of Colorado Telecom Master's degree on Service Management Components For Advanced Intelligent Networks. Painter - painted houses and airplane hangars in the 70s while trying to recover from my back injury. Switch Systems Engineer/Developer - wrote real-time call processing software while at Bell Labs and Siemens Public Switching. The Bell Labs in Colorado made PBXs and Siemens made a Class 5 central office switch (the kind that handles your local phone calls). Sr. Director of IT - Was a Sr. Director of IT in a software development shop, and did it once before in the Satellite Systems area. The main part of this job entailed filtering the stuff from above and below such that both sides don't see the craziness the other side generates. Would be stressful, but I'm kind of used to it. Often threaten to start a page on bonehead things I've caught both sides doing. Director Of Engineering - decided to go to a start-up in 2001 (a 6 month deal) that was supposed to make me rich enough to retire. Then the bottom fell out of the telecom market and we all got laid off. We were designing a DWDM/GigE/SONET box and our job was to build the Element Management System (EMS) for the box. Even though it was for six months, we still learned quite a bit about being a start-up. Best thing that happened to me (besides working with old friends) was that I had to sell my stock options from the previous company before they plummeted to nothing. System Architect - did this job a couple of times since I like the area. Worked at MCI as an architect for an Enhanced Voice Systems project, at U S WEST Advanced Technologies, and at Qwest Communications (worked as a Systems Architect in addition to a Sr. Director of IT software development). Also did it while working in the satellite industry during the 80s. Wig Salesman - now this is a weird one. Took a job selling coupons door-to-door which included selling wigs. The wigs were really crummy. They were made out of Nylon instead of human hair, but I still sold them. Talking about a hard-sell job, this had to be it! Lecturer - lectured on a variety of subjects to large technical audiences on subjects such as flow-through provisioning, inventory control, telecom service management, network and element management, performance management for SONET, requirements analysis, and creating effective software development teams. Driver - worked as a tractor-trailer driver delivering flowers to all parts of the Northern United States to help out a friend. Also drove a tri-axle 10 speed dump truck hauling fill dirt and asphalt. Boy that job got old fast and didn't pay squat. Talk about boring, just shifted gears and avoided dumb drivers constantly. Really got good at driving backwards with a trailer (it's kind of hard to do it well). Antique Auction Bidder - this is something I enjoyed doing in the past for the local PBS station (Channel 12 - KBDI). Basically, I sat at a phone and answered incoming calls to buy antiques and acted as the buyer's representative. I explained stuff to the potential bidder about the antiques, told them if I thought it was a good buy or what it should go for, then told them how to "play the game." A good tactic for those of you that don't know is to let the bid go up a couple of times and then you up the bid closer to what you're wanting to pay (a jump of $100 wouldn't be uncommon). This usually flushes out the nickel and dime folks leaving you to do serious bidding with others like you. There is very fast action and required me to be on top of the game. I usually got "first chair" since I ended up getting the bid on quite a few things and got the PBS station quite a bit of money. Lots of fun. Web Developer - designed several business websites and currently designing the website for a startup company. In case you are interested, unlike this site that was developed using FrontPage, I use Dreamweaver and Cascading Style Sheets (CSS) which is really the way to go. I'll be updating this site to CSS and Dreamweaver once I find the time (ugh).
And then there are the hobbies. Now this is an area that I'm sure I will forget at least some of the hobbies I have had over the years. Not all are on my current list of things I like to do since in some cases I've "been there, done that" and moved on. That, and my body aches too much after doing them.
Well that's about all the time I have for this. Neglecting the various hobbies and all.
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